Light For Others

We all have this amazing relationship waiting for us to acknowledge. A relationship that defines the exact person we are created to be, to be known, and to be loved. We're always loved regardless, even without acknowledging this relationship, but when we do acknowledge it, the love is magnified beyond what we could ever dream of, or have imagined. It's a relationship that starts by giving and us receiving. We've already been given the greatest gift, which is our life. The relationship is with our Father, God. From the moment that I responded to His call, I am always thinking, 'Why would You need me to do that? I can't do that. I'm not the person.' But God never gives up. Even when I thought I was far away from what He asked, there was always another chance to turn back around and say yes. God doesn't say, "Ok, fine. You don't want to, that's your choice. I'll leave you alone." Instead, He keeps saying, "This is you. This is meant for you. Trust Me." After saying yes and stepping forward into His will, I always feel shame and ask Him to forgive me for my doubts.

So lately, I've been thinking of the same people and moments for about a month, and even more so just in the last couple weeks. I prayed to God, "I know You want me to do something. Help me understand. Help me accept." Sometimes I'm in a hurry to want to know what it is, then He lays something out in front of me that says, "Patience!" So, then I pray, "Thank You. I'm sorry, I need help with patience." There is such a unity in being in relationship with our Father that all He gives should be given back to Him. Nobody in this world can give like our Father, so what more can we do for Him, than to give it back to Him? This unity has given me love, hope, and faith in all things. Inexhaustible joy, even in the suffering, because He chose us for earth but ultimately for heaven. This unity also gives me conviction in all things, especially in that I share a connection with others in something far more precious than ourselves, but for the glory of God. That His glory may be known and given to others, through us; that we are vessels for Him to others. What is more precious than that?

Someone asked me where I was going to evangelize, and I responded within my family, but I will go where ever and to who ever the Holy Spirit leads me. I want to see all my family in heaven. I can't force my family to go to church or read the bible, or even read the ten commandments; but I can offer my help, I can help them up when they fall, and I can pray for them. I've asked God to open my eyes to Him in others, and He has been revealed to me in so many different ways. Helping others shouldn't be something that we have to do, but something that we seek to do. My dad has been an alcoholic before I was born, and has been for my 30 years on earth, but I've never loved him any less. Just a couple days ago Mitchell told me, "Mom, I don't think grandpa hollers." I laughed and said, "What do you mean?" He said, "I've never heard grandpa holler, even when he's mad."
I said, "Well you know what? I haven't either." Alcoholism doesn't make my dad a bad person, just a person that needs more love and care. I'm still working with my dad into converting to Catholicism. My dad has been talking much about how he grew up, and there is probably healing coming through that. Another way God works through us, for others, is by being present in someone's healing. I have a friend that I can cry my eyes out to, and she just sits there and listens to me. I love her very much. I am comfortable crying to her and I trust her when she responds to why I'm crying.

Our unity to God becomes stronger, the more we acknowledge our relationship with Him in every thing and every one. We must be open to Him, from the break of day to our bedtimes prayers, and even while we sleep. Every thing in our sight, and every thing we feel, becomes directed toward our relationship with Him. Healing from past hurts is an important step in our relationship, and as good as it is for us, it may also be for the good of God to others; because God is the match that lights our flame and we become the light for others. Something else important to remember is to discern what you think God may be calling you to do. When ever I feel like I'm being pulled to something, I always pray, 'I'll go if it's Your will. Make it known to me that it's Yours, and not some thing I am seeking for myself.' Then I would think about why I would choose something; if it's something I want for myself, then I would pray, "God, I see this as something that I want for myself. Help me to see it as something You want, if it's Your will." Some things don't happen in a snap either. I started praying for my family to go back to church years ago, and they have just recently started going back. So, never give up on prayer. My grandma recently said she feels like the more she prays, the worse things get. I think that's wonderful because her prayers are being answered. If our prayers aren't being answered, every thing would continue in the state that it's in. But God always answers our prayers, His ears are never covered to us. When we pray for something, there's always change, even if it's tough on us, and things seem to be getting worse, our prayers are still inevitably being answered by Him.

Thank you and God bless you!

My dad also asked, "Well I'm an alcoholic though, what about that?"
I said, "Dad! Jesus said He comes for the sick, not those who are well."