Friendliness as a virtue: a Catholic perspective
As people of faith, exercising virtue is at the top of the list in terms of living the gospel day by day. There will always be challenges and adversities in being human. One challenge most people encounter daily is how to respond correctly during a disagreement. Below are a few ways to respond when miscommunication is present, and tempers start to flare.
Pause
Taking a pause before responding criticism or an opposing view. Speak less and listen more. Depending on the temperament of the person you are communicating with, it is best to choose your words carefully as miscommunication is usually where problems begin and end. Taking the pause is step one when it comes to dealing with a difficult situation or personality.
Prayer
In the middle of tension, taking an inner moment to pray is the best way to bring God into the circumstance. The Lord will guide you step by step especially when you are trying to find the right words to respond. Don’t be afraid to ask the person you are speaking with to slow down a bit and take the time to listen carefully along with you. It is a challenge when dealing with a person who may seem defensive, so prayer is always the best weapon to bring God into the situation and to bring peace.
Walk Away if Needed
If tensions become heated, don’t be afraid to walk away but do it in a tactful way and not in a heated manner. Simply “walking out” or slamming doors in anger is not the way to do it. Ask the person if you can take a break but say it with love if you are able. If the other person is still not seeming willing to listen or slow down, then excuse yourself for a bit just to cool off and ask for God’s help during the disagreement. Walking away to pray, to relax, and to gather your thoughts may be exactly what is needed for peace.
Give it to God
Most of all, give the situation to God and keep praying. When you are dealing with a reasonable person, most of the time things will work out in the end. Not all relationships are positive all the time, but the way you handle a difficult situation says a lot about you and your relationship with God. Your calm, your kindness, and your love speak volumes to the person and situation at hand. Giving it to God will enable you to have peace, move on, and trust in his plan for your life today and always.