Are You a Good Husband?

What makes a good husband? 

Remember, if you are old enough, the John Cassavetes motion picture ‘Husbands’?  With Peter Falk and Ben Gazzara, it had quite and impression on this young school teacher.  It was about three New York guys, professional, and approaching middle age.  Seemed they had some growing up to do as time was slipping away. Some men just never want to grow up.   

I heard St. Joseph was a good husband.  My father and father-in-law were good husbands.   I hope I’m a good husband, and you?   

Proverbs 31:10   “An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.”

The better husbands seem to want to be with their wives, enjoy their company and do many things together.  Dinner, shopping, visiting friends, sharing responsibilities with the children and around the house.  Sharing their lives is what glues them.  “I want to be with you everywhere” sings Fleetwood Mac.   It’s not as that old joke goes - We go out to dinner twice a week; she goes on Tuesdays and I go on Friday’s.

Happy couples laugh together, and often.  It’s good for the couple’s and the husband or wife’s health.  Communication is important in that the husband talks, not just the wife.  It breaks down barriers and also keeps them connected.  Ever have one of those belly laughs when your sides ache.  It would be nice to have at least one a year besides the daily chuckles.   Serious illnesses stay at bay with some good laughs.  Really.   

A good husband supports his wife when matters pile up.  He cares for her and her daily concerns. Stress at the job, listening  when necessary, financial security. He’s there for her daily and she knows it.  He respects her opinions, her feelings, her health needs, her tastes.   As strange as it might seem to some, let her mix her peas and her mashed potatoes.  Join her with a dish of pigeon peas, rice and pork chops.  You may grow to like it and have it more often.  You know spaghetti and collard greens is a delicious combo; mix in some salt, pepper, garlic, olive oil and chicken broth.  Getting close to home here.

Ephesians 5:31  “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”
She was so pretty when you first met and went out.  At her best.  What about with her hair in curlers, without make-up, or when she loses her figure or maybe some teeth at 64? The Beatles sang it, “Will you still need me, will you still feed me when I’m 64?”  So a husband ultimately accepts her just the way she is.  He sees her as God sees her.

A husband puts away childish things, has that sense of responsibility and lets the youngsters play baseball and smoke the marijuana.  We know these guys.  Same as in the movie mentioned above except those characters were into alcohol and hookers.  

Finally, husbands are called to help fulfill other kinds of physical needs.  The Puritans who landed at the Mayflower made this a conscious responsibility of husbands and wives.  A Christian responsibility unlike what some non-Christians think of our religion.

                1 Corinthians 7:3-5 “The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”

It’s not difficult.  Easy for me to say as I have the best wife a man could ask for. You know what helps? Go to church and pray together.  

Related Sources: 

Baglino, Michael J.  2022 “Michael and Sarah II: A Short History and Short Bio.”  More From a Florida Catholic.  Penguin Writers. 

Baglino, Michael J.  2022 “Sarah Baglino and Our TV Sitcom.”  You Only Live Thrice.  Penguin Writers.