Forgiveness - A Critical Test for Every Christian

If you are open to be rigorously tested as to your spiritual maturity, dare to take this critical test:

If some criminal offense happened not to you, but to a stranger down the street, you should, of course, be saddened that God had been offended by the sin of the assailant. Nevertheless, since you were not personally offended in that hypothetical situation, you probably would not be indignant or feel bitterness toward the assailant. We hear daily news reports of rapes, muggings, hit-and-run crimes, etc., to which most of us have little or no spiritual reaction. If you were the victim, would you be hate-filled, embittered or even vengeful? If so, why? Is it only because you were the victim, and not some stranger?

Here’s the catch: We should be equally indignant toward any sin, regardless of whether we were the victim or whether another was victimized, even if that victim were unknown to us. Our response, of course, should include compassion for the victim, and also a kind of anguish in knowing that God was offended by that crime. However, if you were the victim, and any resentment or bitterness or vengeance arose within you at all, it would show your self-pity, but not primarily a deep concern that God was offended—far more than you!

Forgiving others is usually exercised in the context of ourselves or our loved ones being hurt by others, by rape, theft, burglary, injustice, marital infidelity, etc. The reason why loving forgiveness is the ultimate test of authentic Christianity is because, as Jesus reminds us, “even godless people love those who love them” (Matt. 5:47). True Christians love even those who don’t “love back” in response to our efforts to love them with a spiritual love.

It is not easy to love an unloving person those who don’t love us—or who may really hate us. It’s a challenge of Christian love for us to profoundly forgive, when we are personally offended. We tend to forget Jesus’ words, “Be merciful as your heavenly Father is merciful" (Luke 6:36). Or the words we blithely recite in the Lord’s Prayer: "Forgive us as we forgive." In the words of James 2:13, "Mercy will not be shown to anyone who is not merciful.” This mandate is most vehemently expressed by Jesus himself in Matthew 6:15: "If you do not forgive others, your heavenly Father will not forgive you your sins." Such a person is then in a horribly sinful state of unforgiveness toward another, blocking their own forgiveness from God. Any unforgiving person is not just emotionally immature, but also lacks the virtue of humility, since it is pride that prevents giving forgiveness. That horrific state of sin jeopardizes their very salvation.

The greatest challenge of Christian spirituality is to believe that no one is intrinsically unlovable, and no one is intrinsically unforgivable—except the reprobate souls and the demons who despise giving or receiving love. They angrily reject and spurn every offer of love or forgiveness from us or from God. Outside of hell, no one can keep you from loving or forgiving, although you’ll find a few bitter and immature persons who, like the souls in hell, refuse to accept your love or your forgiveness. Be sure to pray for these twisted souls before they continue their love-refusal in an eternity of frozen lovelessness. You are sure to find such love-refusing persons, but don’t ever become one!

Remember, forgiving is not condoning an evil; it is accepting the evildoer with a spiritual love, which is not necessarily an emotional friendship love, or a romantic love or marital love, etc., but a "benevolential" love, as St. Thomas calls it. To use the words of St. Augustine, "you must hate the sin, as God hates the sin; but you must love the sinner, as God loves the sinner" (since every sinner is a potential saint, like the repentant thief crucified with Jesus, or like the murderous terrorist Saul, who became Paul, Christianity’s champion).

This obligatory type of love is also called “agape love.” It is exercised by the will, not necessarily with emotions; hence, forgiving does not mean that you must like a person who offended you (more importantly, they offended God). it is an interior act of “love of benevolence” by which you sincerely desire good for the person—the spiritual good of their repentance and subsequent growth in grace, the good of their salvation, and the good of even material blessings.

Read very carefully and prayerfully the four rules that Jesus provides about relating to our enemies (Luke 6:27-36): 1) love your enemy (with spiritual, benevolential, agape love); 2) do good to your enemy, not just refrain from doing evil toward him; 3) pray for your enemy; and 4) call down God's special blessings on them (things like family happiness, health, prosperity, etc.). This last norm is also found in 1 Peter 3:9’ “Repay evil with a blessing.”

Those four commands of Jesus are the applications and also the sign of authentic Christianity: "By this will all know that you are my disciples, that you show your love for one another" That includes your enemies! And the love required is the agape love described above. When emotional love, romantic love, or friendship love or conjugal love is almost dead and hard to revive, still at least this agape love is easy for any true follower of Jesus. We must strive, with God's grace, to exercise that kind of love in every hurtful situation, and by our example (especially in parenting) show others how they can and must love.

In the words of Pope St. Pius V, "In loving our enemies, there shines forth in us some likeness to God our Father, who by the death of his Son…reconciled to himself those previously hostile toward him. Following God's example, we must desire for everyone eternal life; additionally, every Christian has the duty to respect and try to understand everyone without exception, because of his dignity as a human person, made to the image and likeness of the Creator."

On the next hurtful thing you experience from another, think about God’s uncompromising demand to forgive. Ponder it well every time you are offended by anyone. Your gentle loving response—at least mentally, if it can’t be communicated appropriately by word—will flood your soul with graces, and accumulate for you unimaginable heavenly joys and rewards that will thrill your very being throughout eternity.

+++++++++++++++