What were you thinking?

A voice in your head asks, “What were you thinking?”

I don’t know. I thought I’d give them a try. How can they worship a cookie? I got out of there as quick as I could!

A voice in your head asks, “Why don’t you look up the Real Presence?”

Why? I don’t believe in that?

A voice says, “That’s right, it’ll just confuse you. Stick to your guns, those people are idolaters.”

A voice says, “Doesn’t Scripture say, “I am the bread of life”? And “the Scripture can not be broken.”

Those are two different verses. But, yes. Scripture does say that. Ok, I guess it can’t hurt to look it up. Let’s see what it says on the internet. Hm, all those are Catholic sites. Let’s see what wiki says.

Wow, lots of different beliefs. But it looks like most Reformed Christians believe in the Real Presence, even if it is “spiritual”. Hm?

Then, you think to yourself:

Doesn’t that mean that they worship the “cookie” too? If a spiritual presence is a “real” presence, then they believe that Jesus, God, is in the cookie?! But, how can Christians, who believe in the Sole authority of Scripture, come to believe in the Real Presence?

A voice says, “Who cares what they think? It’s what Scripture says that matters.”

A voice says, “Yes, look it up in Scripture. John 6.”

John 6?

John 6:35 And Jesus said unto them, I am the bread of life: he that cometh to me shall never hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never thirst….51 I am the living bread which came down from heaven: if any man eat of this bread, he shall live for ever: and the bread that I will give is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world.

Huh? Why didn’t I ever see this before?

A voice says, “Keep reading.”

Ok.

53 Then Jesus said unto them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Except ye eat the flesh of the Son of man, and drink his blood, ye have no life in you. 54 Whoso eateth my flesh, and drinketh my blood, hath eternal life; and I will raise him up at the last day. 55 For my flesh is meat indeed, and my blood is drink indeed. 56 He that eateth my flesh, and drinketh my blood, dwelleth in me, and I in him. 57 As the living Father hath sent me, and I live by the Father: so he that eateth me, even he shall live by me. 58 This is that bread which came down from heaven: not as your fathers did eat manna, and are dead: he that eateth of this bread shall live for ever. 59 These things said he in the synagogue, as he taught in Capernaum. 60 Many therefore of his disciples, when they had heard this, said, This is an hard saying; who can hear it?

Oh my God!?

A voice says, “Don’t get confused! He doesn’t mean it literally! Remember what your Pastor says?”

Yeah, he says some people get confused reading the Bible. How could he say that? I got angry and told him that the Bible is perspicuous. That’s why I’m looking for another Church in the first place. If we can’t trust the Bible, we may as well be Catholics.

A voice says, “What did the Apostles think?

No. Paul! What does Paul say? Sometimes I wonder about the rest of the Apostles. Look at James for goodness sake. Luther was right, that’s an epistle of straw!

You turn the page and the Bible opens to 1 Corinthians 11.

Ok. Let’s see.

1 Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ. 2 Now I praise you, brethren, that ye remember me in all things, and keep the ordinances, as I delivered them to you….23 For I have received of the Lord that which also I delivered unto you, that the Lord Jesus the same night in which he was betrayed took bread: 24 And when he had given thanks, he brake it, and said, Take, eat: this is my body, …

Wait! What?! Is this Paul?

…which is broken for you: this do in remembrance of me. 25 After the same manner also he took the cup, when he had supped, saying, this cup is the new testament in my blood: this do ye, as oft as ye drink it, in remembrance of me. 26 For as often as ye eat this bread, and drink this cup, ye do shew the Lord's death till he come. 27 Wherefore whosoever shall eat this bread, and drink this cup of the Lord, unworthily, shall be guilty of the body and blood of the Lord.

WHAT? Paul believes in the Real Presence!?

A voice says, “No, he doesn’t!”

That’s what that says. It's clear as day. Why didn’t I ever see it before?

A voice says, “And immediately there fell from his eyes as it had been scales: and he received sight forthwith, and arose, and was baptized.”

You call your wife

Honeeee!

What is it? Why are you sweating?

And crying. My heart feels like its gonna burst!

I’ll call the hospital.

That’s not it! That’s not it!

What is it then?

I think God is calling me to be Catholic.

You have gone crazy! Let me call the doctor, I’m sure he can give you something for your nerves.

Yeah, maybe that’s it. Look there’s a bottle of whiskey in the cabinet.

You don’t drink!

My dad used to give me a shot whenever I was sick. Like a hot toddy. Just give me a shot. It calms me down.

Uh! What other secrets are you keeping from me?! Here! Take your own shot! I’m not gonna be Catholic! Never! They used to tie up the Bible!

(Drinking straight from the bottle.) Ah, that’s hot. Yeah, it helps. That’s actually a good thing, tying up the Bible, I mean. It’s not a bad thing. Universities used to do that also. And do you remember in those old movies, when people would go to a phone booth and they would find a book tied up there?

That wasn’t a bible.

No, but it wasn’t tied up to keep it from the people. They tied it up to keep people from stealing it. Remember in those movies how they would try to pull it off and then, when they couldn’t, they would tear out the page they needed. That’s why the Catholic Church used to tie up the Bible.

So, people could tear it up?!

No, (laughing) to protect the Bible!

How do you know this?

I found that out by accident, on the internet.

And you believe everything on the internet?

No, but that makes sense, doesn’t it?

I guess. BUT… I’m still not turning Catholic!

Ok, I understand. But, come, read this in Scripture. Did you ever see this before?

You’re scaring me.

Take a swig.