An Investment in Grace
It was a sunny Friday; Helen, my wife, was off work and I was unscheduled. We decided to go to noon Mass at the downtown Jacksonville, Fla., church – the Basilica of the Immaculate Conception – and then grab a nice, leisurely lunch. It would be nice break to take time just for ourselves for a change.
In the parking lot after Mass, we spotted a bedraggled man quietly asking others for help. Seeing needy people is not unusual in most cities. They often present us with a conundrum. If the need is genuine, we want to help. But we don’t want that help going up anyone’s nose or chugged down from a bottle. And it’s not always easy to make an on-the-spot decision.
On this beautiful, sun-splashed afternoon we had just been inspired by a brief homily reminding us that it was our responsibility to respond to need and let God take care of the rest. But Helen and I seldom carry more than a couple of dollars, and we had just put what scant cash we had in the basket at Mass. We instantly regretted not adopting the practice of keeping a few “care packages” in the car.
Still, the guy seemed sincere. Helen dug deep in her purse for any loose change. I pulled out the few coins in my pocket and cleaned out the small stash of change from the car’s center console. In all, we probably scrounged up close to five bucks. Not much, but not nothing, either.
“Sorry,” I said as I poured the change into the man’s cupped hands. “Best we can do.”
The man scanned the coins in his hands, looked at me, and then violently flung the money into the bushes nearby. He stormed away, grumbling, “I can’t do anything with that.”
Helen and I looked at each other – stunned. We felt used, violated. Our shock was eased only by the fact that we had done what Jesus asked us to do – give without concern for the results.
That evening, sitting in the lanai with the cat on my lap and a beer in my hand, I still felt the sting of a rejected gift; a grace tossed away. Why did he do that? And then it hit me.
How many times had I rejected gifts – God’s gifts? Tossed aside His graces?
It’s easy to take some of of God’s gifts for granted: family, friends, health, employment, food, clothes, shelter – life’s necessities. But we also tend to forget the gifts that enrich our lives.
When God wants us to take joy in His creation, He has birds sing to us. He shares His beauty in the delicate petals of a flower and the grand expanse of a vibrant, multi-colored sunset. There’s excitement in the touch of a spouse, and peace in a gentle rainfall. There’s wonder in something as small as the buzz of a hummingbird or something as immense as a total lunar eclipse. And, of course, God gives us majesty in the gift of Himself in the form of the Eucharist.
When I take His gifts for granted – toss them aside – does Jesus also feel used and rejected?
Whether He does or not, maybe I should still try a bit harder to live in the moment, take a breath and be a little more conscious of what’s going on around me. And then actually thank God for those gifts.