Fairness, Judgement, and Grace

My husband is fond of comparing my life to The Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard. He feels very strongly that I am like the workers who came early and are later offended that their pay is the same as those who came at the end of the day. I have to vehemently disagree.

To be perfectly honest, I haven't been working in the vineyard from early morning. I relate much more to the people who were called at noon and agreed to work for "whatever is fair". I'm not forgetting the 15+ lost years...Still, it has been my experience that even my better-late-than-never attempt at living a faithful life has been rewarded by much more than what is fair. And, let's not forget, that's just what is here..."eye has not seen". How great is our God? Why would we want others to miss out on that, even when they come to the party during the cleanup?

Ultimately, this parable is about fairness and, even though we are all most prone to grumbling when we see unfairness in the world, let's face it...the world is not fair. Having grown up with many siblings and now raising a bunch of siblings, it's pretty clear that this is true. So, why do we expect that things should be fair?

I think if we're honest, it's a little bit like the whole judgment thing. We're very apt to complain when the "unfair" falls on us but when we are the receiving end of more-than-fair…not so much. I'm not begrudging anyone, really. If I end up with more, especially when I know I worked hard, it's not my first instinct to point out the others who also worked hard and got less (and certainly not those who just showed up and not much more). Kind of like, when someone’s judgment is in our favor (or we are judging someone positively) it's all good. No one is going to say "Oh, you said such nice things about me and since you're against judgment, you're breaking your own rule." Just thought I'd point that out.

This has been a good exercise for me. I do understand why DH feels the way he does, especially when I'm annoyed at a Sponsor checking her phone during Confirmation. In my defense, though, it's not flat-out judgment that the person is wrong. It's knowing a. my reaction to such behavior, knowing myself and my children are so easily led into making the wrong choices (yes, it's doubt in God's power in my life...working on it) and b. my desire that everyone, especially the "latecomers", get to the vineyard as soon as possible so that they can also earn their reward (which will be so much than any of us deserve).

Ultimately, be charitable and don't compare so much. Look to John 21:21-22 for some inspiration. 

"When Peter saw him, he said to Jesus, “Lord, what about him?”
Jesus said to him, “What if I want him to remain until I come? What concern is it of yours? You follow me.”"

Put plainly, be sure that you are following Him before start concerning yourself with the behavior of others. If you want to concern yourself with others - pray for those who need extra grace today (I'm sure some of them are praying for you).