A Lamb in a Thornbush

In my many years in providing priestly spiritual direction I have often been approached by clients complaining of a symptom that they find hard to describe— not quite the same as depression, but a kind of heavy-heartedness—the opposite of what a “light-hearted’ exuberant happy-go-lucky person might manifest. In one counseling session, a farmer client told me, in his quaint and graphic phraseology, that his heart was “as heavy as a bucket of hog livers.”

After I probed his psyche with a series of exploratory questions, I discovered that he was suffering from a not uncommon symptom of suppressed guilt—a series of moral failures in his past that he hadn’t been able to face directly because of an unfounded fear of encountering a wrathful God who would respond with a threat of hellfire.

With a quick silent prayer, I slipped into my “good shepherd” role and gently sermonized him, kindergarten-style, with Jesus’ parables of the lost sheep and the Prodigal son. I tried to describe the simple truth of Jesus’ gentle mercy, and show that God’s driving eagerness to forgive us is far stronger than our desire to be forgiven.

This Bible-based “reality therapy” proved to be more therapeutic than simple “non-directive counseling.” He had heard of, but never seriously pondered, the beauty of God’s very personal loving mercy. His heart melted when he suddenly realized that he had never pleaded with God to extend his mercy, but that God had, for years, been pleading with him to receive it.

His edge-of-the chair eagerness to learn of God’s gentle compassion was gratifying for me to witness, and his sudden transition from habitual heavy-hearted demeanor to light-hearted tearful joy was a graced moment in my ministry that I’ll never forget. When I quoted Jesus’ words, “Do not let your heart be troubled,” he fell to his knees and asked me for what no lay counselor could ever provide—confessional absolution. He left my office as a light-hearted, joy-filled person, miraculously transformed emotionally and spiritually!

Of all 27 human emotions, guilt is probably the most corrosive to our physical and human emotional integrity. Yet, most guilt-torn souls have at least some faint awareness that God has the answer, and their healing very often can be almost miraculous if their heart cries out, even silently, the pleadings of heavy-hearted David in his repentance: “Let your steadfast love become my comfort according to your promise… Let your mercy come to me” (Ps. 119:76-77).

Jesus explains the slavery that sin produces: "Very truly, I tell you, everyone who commits sin is a slave to sin…But if the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed:” (John 8:34-36). To escape from the slavery of sin and guilt, one needs to become poignantly aware of the Lord’s passionate desire to deliver every soul from such bondage—instantly—by his great mercy. How to avail yourself of that ever-present divine loving mercy is what this Jubilee Year of Divine Mercy is all about. Do you hear the Good Shepherd calling out to you by your name? Don't die trapped in the thornbush!