In the First Place

“In the first place, it should be known that if a person is seeking God, His Beloved is seeking him much more.” St. John of the Cross

I was listening to the reading of Zacchaeus. Father Luigi Giussani, in his work with the movement, Communion and Liberation, referred back to the story of Zacchaeus often. Zacchaeus was a small man and wanted to see Jesus. He climbed the tree, and Jesus told him to come down because He would go to his home. Incredible feelings must have overcome Zacchaeus in that moment. I recall often meeting a person who strikes me as being someone I could follow. In university, there was a priest at the parish near where I lived who was not such an obvious person, but he was someone you could approach. He listened and had a demeanor that seemed to look right through you. I never did know what happened to him after I graduated and moved on with my life, but I still remember that person. People leave an impact on us through life. Sometimes it is positive, sometimes negative, but we need to take in what we can from the people we have met who seem to have some sort of relationship with us. There is always a possibility of growth. Zacchaeus must have been overjoyed to host our Lord.

“Fight all error, but do it with good humor, patience, kindness, and love. Harshness will damage your own soul and spoil the best cause.” St. John Cantius

I think often of saints who have done some good for others along the way. I often wonder how they could be so determined when all odds are stacked against them. How many saints wandered around looking for someone to follow before they finally met someone? St. Camillus de Lellis was a gambling-addicted outlaw. He would go to a brothel or drinking establishment and he ‘enjoyed’ his life. That obviously was not enough. He became the founder of the Camillians and patron saint of the sick. The son of an officer in the service of Spain, he was a soldier of fortune, sick with gambling to the point of losing everything and finding himself living by gimmicks in the street. St. Mary of Egypt lived a desperate life before she encountered something greater. She went to Jerusalem on pilgrimage but not to visit the sites but to seduce the worshippers. Instead, she found herself converted. These are dramatic events but not everyone will have such dramatic conversions. Each one of us is looking for something or someone greater. Our hearts ache for the path ahead to be illuminated. It seems that people who go to a fortune teller or ask 100 people for their opinion refuse to look inward to themselves and outward to our Lord to ask the really deep questions. Giussani spoke often of how we are told and taught many things, and we are given a backpack of information. However, at some point we need to open that bag and look at what we have, and then look to where we need to go. Let us not be afraid to ask for help.

"Consider seriously how quickly people change, and how little trust is to be had in them; and hold fast to God, who does not change.” St. Teresa of Avila

On a recent trip to the Carmel Cloister, I was reminded that we are to point to Christ for others, not to ourselves. We are not the solution for anyone. That hunger that we all have can only be satiated by Christ. He will give us who and what we need at the appointed time. Let us remind ourselves that He is our starting point, not the people we meet along the way. They are given. I can only recount my own experience in this. The road ahead is arduous but it is not impossible.

“To begin is for everyone. To persevere is for saints.” St. Josemaria Escriva