Jesus, I surrender

     Surrendering can be difficult if it is not done totally with the true meaning of cedng all things into the hands and watchful eye of our Lord and God. We can say it, but we must follow through and do it. Faith comes into play very heavily. We are surrendering to Him our God without actually seeing and touching Him. Him who we truly say we believe in. I tell Him I surrender, but lots of times I don't think I really mean it. If I did, then my worry and stress of the situation would become light and my days more clear, my nights more calmer. Still, thinking that I can do it by myself, or that I am supposed to do it by myself, gets in my way so much. You can't think about it after you say it. Or else it is not a true surrender. 

     I want to be like Mary. Yes, she was startled at Gabriel's announcement and even questioned "how can this be? " But ultimately went off of the promise that She was destined for this great role from the very beginning of Her existence. Motherhood. Our mother. His mother. She was innocent and pure and a devoted child of God. Just like we are all destined to be and created with that intent. She was destined for greatness, just like we all are. Her response, " be it done unto me according to God's will" is what we are all supposed to say. Her example of surrender is the only way to interpret " true surrender". She took on the second biggest role of life, with Jesus's becoming the first. Can you imagine what our lives would be like if she said "no"?... All of heaven was waiting for Her response. Just like they await our response to God when He poses the question of our surrender to Him. You surely must know this to be true. Our daily lives are many choices we must make. Look what happens when God sees into our hearts a denial to Him. Zachariah was struck mute. Adam and Eve were sent out of paradise. Judas committed suicide. Our consequence from Mary's denial would have meant no salvation for any of us. She surrendered for all of us. For that we should all be forever grateful. We would be roaming around with no purpose, no meaning, and God did not create us for that. His will I always smart. He wants us to give it freely and completely, the way Mary did. Our prayers should always consist of this intention every time we pray. " Not my will oh God, but yours be done".Again, this invocation must be done with total surrender. God grant me this grace. 

     I lift the white flag and wave it back and forth oh God. Look upon it with mercy and love, as I surrender to You, who are my leader and my King. Grant me this chance to tell you that my will be done with total resignation and union with yours as your child, the way Mary did. Forgive my delay and teach me your ways. I am Yours and You are mine. Forever. I am weak, but you can strengthen me oh God. Instill into my heart, total surrender. As I proclaim the words, "Jesus I trust in you".