St. Joseph, Pray For Us

These five words, drawn from the Litany of St. Joseph express in the simplicity characteristic of the man of whom little is recorded in Sacred Scriptures, what the nine days novena in his honor invoke: his intercession. On March 19 every year, the Church invites us to celebrate a particularity of Joseph's life: Spouse of the Blessed Virgin Mary. This is one of three celebrations dedicated to Joseph with the next being May 1, St. Joseph, the worker and Holy Family Sunday where St Joseph is celebrated as the foster father of Jesus Christ. While circumscribing particular titles to particular celebrations might be nitpicking, it is my suggestion that on March 19, we emphasize the title of St. Joseph as husband. The title is  relational and comes from the context of marriage. If marriages are in crises today, it is partly because husbands are in crises. Who better to turn to than the greatest of all husbands: St. Joseph?

But is this novena then for husbands only? No. The best person to complain to about your husband is to St. Joseph. Over these nine days, wives should bring their husbands to St. Joseph. Do you have problems with your husband? Try, St. Joseph. Remember a good husband is not the product of mere luck or chance. Could the saying to each their own evoke the question: how much of what my husband is, the product of my own behavior? Wives, in praying for your husband you are praying for yourselves and so over these nine days, go to St Joseph and complain about your husband. What does it say of family dynamics when the man is sad to be an excellent dad but a terrible husband. Make that make sense!

Each man is responsible for his own life and so each husband must ask himself: what kind of a husband am I? Have you prayed for yourself that you may be a good husband? What is your portrait of a good husband? Look to St. Joseph. 

Very often this Solemnity of St. Joseph is celebrated during Lent. It might be worthwhile looking at husbands through the lens of the seven deadly sins. With each vice,there is a corresponding virtue and we shall journey through Lent with St. Joseph. Even though the Gospels do not teach us much about St Joseph, the Church has drawn out lessons from the life of St Joseph and captured them in the Litany.

Three years ago, Fr Banadzem, a priest of the diocese of Kumbo, Cameroon currently studyinf at the Catholic University of America in his homily for the celebration of this Solemnity posed the question: what kind of husband are you? He then went ahead to describe the following husbands:    

Baby Husband –Irresponsible, childish, indecisive, compares with wife; Leaning financially on his family;

Bachelor Husband –Not consulting his wife; hanging out with friends and not being serious about marital commitments.       

An Acidic Husband –Boiling like Acid; always angry; moody; violent, dominating and very dangerous.

A Slave Husband – Wanting to be treated always like a King while treating Immaculate like a slave.

A General Husband – Husband of every woman; who loves and cares for girl friends more than wife.                  

Dry Husband – Very stingy; never considering wife’s emotions; has no sense of humor. 

Panadol Husband – Uses wife as a calculator; problem solver; goes to her when in need of something from her; is clever and knows wife’s weaknesses and capitalizes on that to get what he wants.  

Parasite Husband – Lazy and only loves wife for the sake of money; uses wife’s money on other women; does not help her with house responsibility.

Visiting Husband – Not always at home; comes home like visitor pedagogic inspector; provides all material needs of the house but has no time for wife and children.

A CHRISTIAN HUSBAND – Caring; Loving; Provident; Material; Psychological; Financial; Emotional; Spiritual; Chemical; Geographical; etc needs of the Family.

Are you a husband, pray to St. Joseph? Are you a wife, pray for your husband to St. Joseph? Are you a parent? Pray to St. Joseph for your son to be a good husband. Are you a child, pray to St. Joseph for your father to be a good husband. Are you a priest? Pray to St. Joseph to be a good priest. Are you single and looking for a husband? Pray to St. Joseph to help you find a good husband. 

Let us turn to St Joseph and pray for his intercession and guidance.