"What are We Doing?”

“Let us work as if success depended upon ourselves alone, but with heartfelt conviction that we are doing nothing, and God everything.” St. Ignatius of Loyola

Recently, I attended a conference. Of course, I was not impressed as usual. I go in with the typical cynicism and leave worse off. I was asked about my inattentiveness afterwards and replied with confusion. I am effective in what I do. I write, do podcasts and help others when I can. My question was, why can I not do a presentation? I have never been asked. My vanity took the best of me. I had to listen to people with less experience than me, offer suggestions as to how I could contribute. I listened to others who are asked to be part of the team, and I am left off. I was reminded by my dear friends in the Carmelite cloister that we cannot simply stop at these types of thoughts. In our reactions, it demonstrates a need and a yearning to recognize Christ.

“Jesus Christ, Lord of all things. You see my heart; you know my desires. Possess all that I am. You alone!” St Agatha of Sicily

Saints are thought to be these holier than thou people, but they are not even close to that. Each one had their struggles. Blessed Marcel Callo was an apprentice in a print shop in France. He was engaged to be married but then WWII began. He began to lead friends to help refugees pass through the city. The Nazis took notice and sent him to work. He helped many people around him and again the Nazis took notice that he was ‘too’ Catholic. He was sent to a prison camp and died from terrible conditions and abuse. The colonel of the camp witnessed his death and testified, “Marcel’s… gaze expressed a deep conviction that he was heading for happiness. I have never seen a dying man look like this.” Similarly, Saint Jeanne Jugan spent her life working at lowly jobs. She lost her father young, and her mother had to take care of the family. She worked for a wealthy family and recognized the needs in others. She trained as a nurse and wanted to be as “humble as Jesus” in her words. Once she helped a blind woman and brought her to her own home. She quickly discovered her vocation and founded the religious community, the Little Sisters of the Poor. She called herself Marie of the Cross. Only through humility did Christ show her what he wanted. She listened.

“Holiness consists of doing God’s will and being just what God wants us to be.” St. Therese of Lisieux

St. Therese had her own struggles in the convent. She suffered greatly yet she remained faithful. Each of us likely can testify to some sort of struggle and challenge. It is easy to lose faith in Christ. During this time of Lent, sacrifice and obedience might teach us what we need. With God, nothing is lost. How often do we need to be reminded of this? Probably every day – I know I do. As we search for our path in life, each one of us needs to ask God what He wants. It is never what we think we want. God reveals His plan to us in unique ways. This past week, I can see some great things happening for myself. I would not be able to see them if I was not paying attention and if I did not have someone beside me reminding me that I am loved.

“The most beautiful act of faith is the one made in darkness, in sacrifice and with extreme effort.” Padre Pio