Of Mice and Divorce

God called a meeting with Jesus to discuss the state of the world today. Also in attendance was Abraham, Moses and Peter the disciple and first leader of the Church on earth. 

"I am very concerned about the behaviour of my children these days," God said opening the meeting, "there are many things they are doing wrong which displease Me; but today I would like us to focus on one issue - the way they handle marital matters and its faithfulness to one another.

"I have invited you here Abraham to gain an insight on relationships, especially in view of your marital arrangement with your wife Sarah and her maidservant Hagar!"

Abraham shuffled uncomfortably in his chair and said nothing.

God continued without looking up from His notes, "And I have invited you here Moses because you permitted people to divorce despite knowing My views that marriage is for life and should not be easily dissolved!"

"But they were a stubborn lot," said Moses trying to defend his actions, "they rebelled at every corner for forty years. They moaned and complained about everything. You saw how they built a golden calf and how their hearts had hardened. If I didn't allow divorce they would have continued to jump in bed with one another like rabid rabbits anyway. It was ..."

"... the line of least resistance!" God interrupted softly.

In the few moments' silence that followed Peter thought back to his days on earth and wondered what he would be reprimanded for. He remembered the great denial, but surely that's not what he was here for? Apart from that, the only other thing he could remember was once selling stale fish to someone.

"What do you think of the state of the world, Peter?" God asked, "in particular the state of the Church on earth?"

Peter jumped out of his chair and tried to think quickly. Not his strong point in life. He always talked first and thought later.

"Ehmmm ... well eh ..." he mumbled, "they're a rotten lot," he said. "All the people, those who do not believe and those in the Church, who do believe. At least the unbelievers are honest. They don't believe in You and say so upfront. The believers have doubts, they believe some bits but not others, they misinterpret what you said and taught Jesus, and they want to choose what is right and what is wrong ... a rotten lot. The lot of them."

"I meant in relation to divorce," asked God calmly as Jesus smiled remembering Peter's impetuous character.

"Oh that ..." said Peter, "well it is wrong. Because You said so. Marriage should be for life I say. And the longer the better. If I may say so, Moses, divorce has its problems you know. If a man divorces and marries again he'd have two mothers-in-law. Personally, I found one is enough ... not that mine was a problem of course. You remember ... ... you met her Jesus!"

Jesus nodded and said nothing.

"What do you think has gone wrong with the modern world?" asked God.

Peter was first to answer once more. 

"Well, they've all become selfish, self-centered, wanting to put self first. Self-gratification, entertainment, amusement, fun. Everything is measured in terms of fun. 

"I've even noticed some of their chocolate bars are smaller and called 'Fun Size'. Since when has fun become a unit of measurement? 

"All they want is happiness as if they are entitled to it. When I was alive on earth there was little happiness around, especially with all those Romans, not to mention the Pharisees, Sadducees, scribes, Jewish elders and what have you ..."

"What is wrong with being happy?" asked Jesus, "I went to earth so that they may have life, and have it to the full. Including happiness and joy." 

"Oh well ..." hesitated Peter, "that's different. Life was different then. In those days, to me happiness was getting home of an evening and finding a piece of cheese in the mousetrap!"

"I meant in relation to divorce," God repeated calmly and lovingly not wishing to appear reprimanding, "what do you think is wrong with the world in relation to divorce and what do we do about it?".

"Ah well ..." said Peter, "it should be stopped. People should be stopped from divorcing. Period. The Church should forbid it and make it clearly so. Anyone who divorces from now on should be sent to hell for eternity and suffer his backside being roasted for ever. That'll teach them!"

"Don't you think this is a little unforgiving?" asked God looking sideways at Jesus, "surely we should forgive time and again, not just seven times? Especially in view of the fact that in some divorces one of the partners is the victim and not really to blame at all. How do we deal with the situation where one partner in the marriage acts totally unreasonably, is violent, unfaithful or worse? Do we send both of them to hell?"

"Ehm ... well," Peter replied remembering Christ having forgiven him, "perhaps a lifetime in hell is a bit over the top ... for both of them that is. How about this for a solution? All people who divorce should spend an eternity with each other in a room until they learn to get on with each other? That will be their private hell, or Purgatory ... the couple would remain there together for ever and they'd only get out when they learn the meaning of true love ... caring ... commitment ... that sort of thing!

"We could even extend the scheme to all kinds of disagreements, not just divorce. Disagreements between parents and their children, or siblings, or other relatives. Disagreements in business matters. Disagreements between neighbours ... real ones living next to each other, not in the wider sense of the word as you implied, Jesus. Also disagreements between countries, like in politics. Put the politicians in a room and they don't get out until they resolve their differences. Whole countries even. That will ensure world peace I tell you! That's how I'd resolve divorce and all kinds of disagreements. Put both parties in a room and don't let them out until they learn to love one another!" 

"Thank you, Peter. We'll consider this at our next meeting," said God softly looking at Jesus sitting beside Him. 

Jesus smiled again whilst packing up His papers and closing His laptop.

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