My husband will put things down after he uses them and leaves things lie where they lay. It is his filing system he claims. He also has a list of ‘ready reasons’ why something did not get put back after it was used.
“I was going to do it later.”
“I wasn’t finished using it.”
“It isn’t hurting anything sitting there.”
“I meant to take it back and got busy doing something else.”
Now after 45 years of marriage, you know things don’t change. So, you accept his habits and the total package of the man you love.
I however, am getting better at turning off the light when leaving the room, or I will be reminded to do so. And, the toilet gets flushed, no matter who failed to flush it after the last use. (These are two things that someone obviously as a child was reminded to do on a regular basis, and therefore important to him that those rules are carried out.)
Now, I have gotten aggravated and still can be, about his habits, and become a grump myself. When I do, my ‘holy self’ reminds me that I can, instead, act as Christ tells me to. I can try to be patient, understanding, forgiving and ‘stifle it already with the whining and complaining.’ Everybody knows that whining and complaining does no good and only starts a fight. Thank God, God has given me the grace to choose to smile and be thankful for my husband’s presence still in my life. (He almost died three times now in the past 15 years during surgeries. I have already told him "you better be dying before I let them do any surgery on you again".)
This morning, as I started the rounds of picking up, putting back and tidying the house---these thoughts came to me. “You know, here is why I can really be thankful for his ‘filing system.”
a) I know that he is not an alcoholic---there is only one beer can that sometimes needs to be recycled.
b) I know that he is not addicted to cigarettes or illegal drugs—maybe sweets or candy if wrappers are found or a Pepsi can.
c) I know exactly what chores or projects he has been working on the day before by the tools I find left behind, so he has been helpful and what is broken has been fixed.
d) I know that he is faithful---no strange woman left behind or underwear but mine in the bathroom or bedroom.
So therefore, Oh my Lord, I can give you thanks and praise for this man I have been blessed with, for he truly does bring into my life that which is needed to help me draw closer to You and seek Your wisdom on a daily basis. Because of marriage---I pray more than most, and am gifted due to all that our journey has brought into my life. As You have reminded me God---it is my husband who is the saint for living with me---this righteous, holy woman---and not vice versa. Does that mean we get to celebrate 60 years of marriage, for I tend to be a slow learner? Oh, dear.