That feeling of disappointment

     That's just what it is. A feeling. An emotion that can quickly be dispelled by the simple resignation to God's Holy Will. I know everything isn't going to always go the way I had hoped, but still, that looming feeling of disappointment lingers until I choose to let it go. Saying to myself, over and over (especially when I start getting that far off look), "Jesus I trust in you take care of everything". It eases my discomfort and transforms my thoughts to peace. Like I said, it's an emotion. One that we can control when we surrender our lives to God. 

     The average time one spends on trying to do the best job possible for someone or something is rewarding and benefiting to the soul who is ready to surrender it to God in His care to nourish and teach the lesson. Not for feathers in one's cap or display. Then the art loses its light and is only in the heart of one who needs that kind of attention or acclaim. He gently shows me but I don't need that. To be satisfied with making Him alone happy and to honor Him always in Humility. 

     Disappointment can only come when the expectation reigns too high. When you start putting control in yourself instead of God, you will always be disappointed at some point. You are sure to fall and the landing will be rough. 

     All of the Saints regarded themselves as the lowest of the low and lived in total resignation to humility and accepted disappointment with surrender to the God who knows how to do everything the right way. It's easy to get caught in the web of self and we must always remember that our work is, in itself quite gratifying and needs no strokes to an ego to make it complete. God places us where He wants us. For me, the attachment that adheres to my heart in the faces of those I care for becomes almost "unattachable", when God says it's time to move on. Everything from structure to pace is uprooted and I must wait for His call to go somewhere else. Disappointment tries to settle in and in my frustration, I feel unsettled, not even realizing at the moment that God is teaching me a lesson and to relax because "He's got this". The minute I do step away and listen to His voice is the moment disappointment disappears. My little ritual of sadness and stress disappears into thin air and once again, I am ready to go where He will lead me.