The Marriage in Movie Canon: Dreaming on a Tightrope

With the release of Pope Leo's newest Encyclical tackling the dangers of AI, I thought it might be nice, rather than provide yet another voice on his document at this time, to comment on something that is solidly human in nature: marriage. Thus, we return to the Marriage in Movies Canon. Please note: this article first appeared on my Substack: https://rememberingtomorrow.substack.com. 

Last week (that is, on Substack), we took a sidetrack away from our larger project at hand to discuss the 1900s and the role of the family during that time period. Perhaps for some of you this tangential discussion was mere distraction; for others, perhaps it was a disclaimer. In either case, I hope it provided some context within which to place the prominence of Classic films in this canon. The prominence of such films as The Philadelphia Story, Make Way for Tomorrow, and others is not a mere nostalgia for marriages such as are found in a bygone age; rather, it is an emphasizing of those unchanging characteristics of marriage that are particularly highlighted in those films.

It can be difficult to point to more modern films which capture aspects of marriage in the same ways that older movies can. For one, modern film productions are not mere evolutions of the film industry; I find them to be different in kind than their predecessors. The scores, the special effects, the impossible feats of strength and finesse we are asked to find plausible and more are all evidence of a change that moves beyond normal development. Whereas films used to be more or less dramas or plays caught on screen (even action/thrillers), the modern film is simply written for the camera. I will not deny it the title of art; I merely point out its difference. Modern films simply capture things differently, and in a more cinematic way. Everything seems just that much farther from real life; and marriage is nothing if not real life, as so many of our entries into the canon have shown.

There are more points of departure than the simple one just recounted when we compare films of 1926 to those in 2026. From cinema that creates icons and lifestyles too far removed to be real, to the struggles of portraying the modern life so rapidly advanced in 100 years that even we don’t understand or keep up with it, to even the struggles of individuality and autonomy so novel to culture and society, modern films simply have different material to work with. There are, in fact, so many that treating with them all would be another article in itself, and one that I might not find myself equipped to speak well on (though that wouldn’t stop me from trying.) And so, all this being the case, I do not want to get down the rabbit hole too far in treating with all these points of departure. 

I will say, though, that the struggles of modern films aside, there have been a few that are so masterful in capturing an aspect of marriage that it would be nothing but criminal to omit them here. Truth and human nature is still truth and human nature, no matter the century we happen to find ourselves in. And marriage as an institution - and certainly as a Sacrament - has not changed in nature from its creation. And we as humans will also capture the truth in one way or another through our culture, our art, and our society. And so, though the upcoming group comprising the last entries currently included in the canon of marriage in films also includes some later films, you will find some more recent works as well. 

It is hard to treat a group of films each with the depth they deserve. In addition, I am told by several sources that some of my readers are in danger of being turned away with a books-length article to read instead of the light reading I keep promising during Thirsty Thursdays. With this in mind, I do hope I will find forgiveness in deciding that the remainder of films included in this canon will be treated with singly over the course of the next few weeks. And so, without further ado, let us dive into the first of 5 more films that masterfully capture some aspect or other of the truth and beauty behind marriage.

The Greatest Showman (2017). For a while, I perhaps wondered if this film didn’t remind me of marriage because it played such a prominent role in my own marriage. I was fresh out of college, freshly engaged, and planning a wedding and a future to take place 500 miles from my familiar surroundings. It is a task I would never wish to take up again. My (then) fiancé and I both were exhausted from the planning process, and needed a break. On a whim, I saw that Hugh Jackman was starring in a new film, and there was a showing in the local theater. I bought tickets, and in a flurry of spontaneity we took our seats as the opening number began its rumble. The movie was so impactful, we took one of its songs to play as our first dance as man and wife. We’ve returned to it and enjoyed its songs ever since. 

The Greatest Showman is a musical retelling of how P. T. Barnum became a household name and almost synonymous with the word “circus.” It follows his life from child of poor tailor to man with a dream - and only creative ways to fulfill them. His love interest, Charity (played with exceptional performance by Michelle Williams), is from a well-off family several social classes above him. They hit it off while children and, though separated in their youth, keep in contact until they have grown. They marry as soon as they are able, and begin their married life with nothing but the shirts on their backs - Charity’s father doesn’t too kindly to her running off with a child whose father used to make his clothes.

The two lovebirds do not wait to begin a family. Poverty and destitution aside, they are blessed with two daughters early in their marriage. Barnum keeps their leaky one-bedroom apartment over their heads by punching numbers at a trading company - that is, until the company is forced to lay off the whole staff. Barnum, newly married with a young family and no financial future, takes a mad gamble to become an entertainer. He, with the support of his wife and to the excitement of his children, begins first one endeavor and then another until he settles on what amounts to the first concept of a circus.

The new entrepreneur is beset with financial difficulties, opposition from the social “puritans,” and class struggles. The show undergoes several developments, new talent, and even secures a PR manager (excellently performed by Zac Efron.) All in all, things progress and succeed ever so slightly for the Barnum circus, until Barnum gets the opportunity to pursue what he sees as the key to overcoming his own social status insecurities: a national tour with a famous European opera singer. 

Barnum leaves the circus itself in the hands of his partner and leaves his family to tour the country with his new star. He is gone for a long time, and as often happens when the central figure leaves his foundations, everything crumbles to the ground - literally. The building in which the circus performed burned down beyond repair. The European opera star developed unrequited feelings for Barnum as they traveled, and created a scandal for Barnum before quitting the unfinished tour completely. Barnum’s family, beset now with financial ruin, the ambiguity of the scandal, and the sheer fact that Barnum embarked on the singing tour without the support of his wife, moved back into Charity’s parents home. And finally, Barnum had to contend with having abandoned his entire circus crew - the crew who had made him the success he had just recently thrown away.

Alone, broke, and fallen from heights he had only dreamed of, Barnum comes to his senses when his crew calls him out for feeling sorry for himself. In what can only be described as a memorative intellectus moment (which, if you don’t know what that is, be sure to check out my upcoming book Remembering Freedom), Barnum suddenly realizes that all he ever did, all he ever wanted to do, was to provide for his family. The world in which his family could dream was the world he had only ever desired to make. In light of this memory, the Barnum family reunites, Barnum’s partner puts up the money to restart the circus, and the building that burnt was replaced by the iconic circus tent. To the resounding reprisal of the movie’s titular song, Barnum finally leaves the circus in the capable hands of his full partner, and joins his family for a ballet recital of his daughter - one of many he had already missed, one of many more that he would never miss again.

With that narrative in hand, one might struggle to find where exactly this musical fits into the canon of marriage in films. Barnum is accused of infidelity, his spouse leaves him and takes their children, Barnum isolates himself and his family from their extended family, and Barnum himself chases fame and fortune above his family. If anything, you might be tempted to proclaim, this movie is a showcase for marriage as it shouldn’t be! You would only be so tempted, however, if all you have to go on is this short synopsis. 

Barnum in this musical is distracted by a life he never had and a status he doesn’t own. He spends most of the film metaphorically (and, in one brief moment, actually) looking into a window from the outside: the people inside the window are sipping wine, laughing, and enjoying the fineries of wealth, whereas he and his family are happily encountering the world with nothing but their own merry company. And though for most of the film Barnum is under the pretenses of being distracted for the sake of his family, the character growth and pitfalls of his circumstances reveals that it was selfishness and mistaken priorities driving his chase for acclaim all along.

Charity, his wife, is by and away the best character in the musical. The scenes where she plays off her husband and vice versa are not as frequent or as many as you might have expected; and yet, the directors of this film do an admirable job capitalizing on the few shots we do get of their relationship. Throughout the film, Charity is generally is able to keep Barnum grounded and with the correct perspective: magic and happiness doesn’t come from things, it comes from the magic of life begetting life and building a world within which that life flourishes. She has the most moving and what I think well-written number in the musical, delivered just after Barnum leaves her and their children to begin the national tour. There is where her devotion and grounding principle truly shines. Through her delivery of the song, we can appreciate not only what Barnum did for her  - leadership, devotion, and provision for the world they make together - , but what she provided to Barnum: the context and fidelity to that worldview without which there is nothing but emptiness and loneliness.

In this light, a cursory viewing might suggest that Charity abandoning Barnum at his lowest would be a betrayal of all she had previously stood for. In fact, the opposite is true: while Barnum was galavanting off on a tour Charity had no part or support in, she was left with a house that was foreclosed on, care of two children, and the stories of a husband who had begun a public affair behind her back. Her fidelity to the world they had made together made her duty clear: find safety for herself and her children until her husband could come to his senses and return to lead the creation of their familial world.

Thankfully, Barnum returns to his senses very quickly. He realizes - and remembers - who all his efforts was supposed to be for, and doesn’t stop for a moment’s thought as he rushes to right his wrong. He reunites with Charity, begs her forgiveness in a tender recommitment of his own fidelity, to which she responds with the refrain she has always sung: “However big, however small, let me be part of it all.” And so, her witness and fidelity to the marriage view and family they had built, coupled with Barnum’s genuine (though often and at one point completely misguided) dedication to creating the magical world his marriage is founded upon is the dynamic which causes me to include this film in our canon. 

Watching the movie now almost 10 years later, there are some what the kids would call cringe moments. The movie definitely dates itself with some of the racial/social undertones it takes, and there are a few subtle virtue-signaling moments. In addition, the movie takes some artistic liberties with the factual events and characters in the story of P.T. Barnum. But by and large, the narrative told by The Greatest Showman is a heartwarming one of marriage and family that places the union of the spouses as the foundation - not the capstone - in the lives of the spouses. 

Have you read Remembering Freedom yet? It is a book for the modern defender of truth. Designed to be both engaging and practical, this book articulates abstract concepts while providing real-life stories from married life, military deployments, and more to illustrate how “abstract” things look in the real world. If you are looking to enter into discussions, or if you find yourself wondering how on earth we got to the point we are at now, Remembering Freedom is the book for you.

Read Remembering Freedom Now!