Preparing for Your First Confession or Returning Home

Reflect and Examine Your Conscience
Find a quiet place and think about your actions since your last confession (or baptism) take a few minutes to ask the Holy Spirit for light and honesty.
Don’t aim for perfection—aim for truth. If you like, jot down a few words on paper.

Ask yourself: Have I hurt anyone? Have I neglected to do good? Use an Examination of Conscience guide (see USCCB.org), or reflect on the Ten Commandments.

Simple Examination of Conscience:  Read through these questions slowly. Pause where something stands out. You do not need to answer every question
—use them to remember what you need to confess.

• Love of God: Do I pray? Do I ignore God when I am busy? Have I used God’s name carelessly? Do I skip Mass on Sundays or holy days without a serious reason?
• Love of neighbor: Have I been unkind, impatient, or rude at home, school, work, or online? Have I gossiped, lied, or exaggerated to make myself look better?
• Honesty and responsibility: Have I cheated, stolen, or wasted time at work/school? Have I failed to keep promises or responsibilities?
• Respect: Have I disrespected my parents/guardians, teachers, or rightful authority? Have I held onto anger or refused to forgive?
• Purity and self-control: Have I chosen entertainment, websites, or conversations that I knew were wrong? Have I lacked self-control with alcohol, food,
  vaping/drugs, or other habits?
• Justice and charity: Have I ignored someone who needed help? Have I been selfish with my money, time, or talents? Have I been unfair or prejudiced?
• What I failed to do: What good did I avoid because it was inconvenient—apologizing, helping, telling the truth, standing up for someone, or choosing what is right?

Try to be clear and specific (without telling unnecessary stories). If you are aware of a serious sin, mention it plainly and, if possible, how many times. If you are
unsure whether something is serious, you can simply say so and ask the priest for guidance.

Go to the Confession
You may be able to confess behind a screen (anonymous) or face-to-face. Either is fine. If you forget what to do, simply say, “Father, I’m not sure what to say next,” and
the priest will guide you step-by-step. Make an appointment (recommendeded), or wait your turn at scheduled times.  Confession may take place in a confessional
booth, or face-to-face with the priest anywhere.  If you feel nervous, remember that the priest is there to help, not judge.

Begin Your Confession
Greet the priest and make the Sign of the Cross. Say, “Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. This is my first confession.”  On your next confession say: 
“Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.  My last confession was X time (weeks, months, years) ago.” Confess your sins honestly and simply. You don’t have
to go into detail; just mention what you’ve done and its frequency. 

Listen to the Priest
The priest may offer advice and will assign you a penance (prayers or actions to help you grow spiritually). He will ask you to say an Act of Contrition.
You can use the following prayer or another version:

Act of Contrition
O my God, I am sorry for my sins with all my heart. In choosing to do wrong and failing to do good, I have sinned against You, whom I should love above
all things. I firmly intend, with Your help, to do penance, to sin no more, and to avoid whatever leads me to sin. Amen.

If you know a different version, you may use it. If you don’t have it memorized, you can read it from a card or ask the priest to prompt you line by line.

Confiteor (Penitential Act) at Mass
At the beginning of Mass, we pause for the Penitential Act. Often we pray the Confiteor (“I confess…” see below), though some Masses use a different approved form.
This prayer is said each Mass so we can honestly acknowledge our sin, ask God’s mercy, and be spiritually prepared to worship and to receive the Eucharist.
With sincere repentance, it helps cleanse us of venial sins, but it does not replace Sacramental Confession for mortal sin.

The Confiteor:
I confess to almighty God and to you, my brothers and sisters, that I have greatly sinned, in my thoughts and in my words, in what I have done and in what I have
failed to do, and through my fault, through my fault, through my most grievous fault (striking your breast three times); therefore I ask blessed Mary ever-Virgin,
all the Angels and Saints, and you, my brothers and sisters, to pray for me to the Lord our God.

Sometimes the Penitential Act is prayed with short invocations (for example, “Lord, have mercy”) instead of the Confiteor. No matter the form,
the purpose is the same: to turn back to God’s mercy as we begin the sacred liturgy.

After Your Confession
After you confess your sins, the priest will give you absolution (God’s forgiveness). Listen carefully and make the Sign of the Cross when he does. You will then have the
opportunity to pray the Act of Contrition. When you finish, he may say something like “Go in peace,” respond, “Thanks be to God,” or just thank him and leave the
confessional cleansed.

Complete Your Penance                            
Do your penance as soon as you reasonably can—often you can do it right away in church. Penance does not “pay for” forgiveness; it is a small act that helps heal,
repair, and strengthen your heart after receiving God’s mercy.

Final Tips:

• It’s okay to be nervous—many people are. The priest has heard every kind of sin and is there to help you.
• Speak simply: what you did, and (if you can) how often. Avoid naming other people or giving long explanations.
• End with a real intention to change: one small, concrete step you will take with God’s help.
• Afterwards, if you realize you sincerely forget a sin, don’t worry.  You have been absolved from all sins, even ones you don’t realize or remember. 
  You may include any at your next confession, if it remains heavy on your heart.

Confession is a gift to receive God’s mercy and begin again. If you’re unsure about anything, ask the priest—your questions are welcome.