The Cross That Carries Us

(619 words, 3 minutes read time.)

** A Past Meditation **
Written in the past and newly restored.

Kneeling after Mass,

looking up at the Crucifix,

this thought quietly came to my heart:

Perhaps this illness is but a sliver of the nail in Jesus’ feet.

So small compared to His suffering,

yet an invitation

to share in His Cross

and allow Him to reign more fully in my soul.

My only response was,

“Lord,

help me to carry it.”

I also sensed how He carries this suffering with me.

How small my portion is,

and how immeasurably greater is His.

Later, I remembered moments from my childhood.

There were brief seasons when the Lord allowed my suffering to lessen.

Yet I noticed something that surprised me.

Without realizing it,

I often became less attentive to Him.

I became distracted,

more self-reliant,

and gradually forgot the closeness I had known during the harder days.

Even then, though I could not explain it,

I sensed that my suffering had somehow drawn me nearer to God.

Years passed.

As I grew older, I wandered far from the Lord for many painful years.

In His great mercy,

He brought me home.

Now I find myself in a new season,

seeking His will more deeply,

and He continues to reveal His love in unexpected ways.

At times,

my illness has felt like a great obstacle—

something standing in the way of serving Him as I had imagined.

Yet the Lord sees.

Again and again,

He has sent faithful friends to encourage me.

And He continues to challenge my own ideas about how I should live and serve.

I am a slow learner.

Thankfully,

He is infinitely patient.

Each of us has a cross entrusted to us.

Though we would rarely choose it for ourselves,

when united with Christ,

it can become the very path that leads us more deeply into His Heart.

As I prayed,

I found myself reflecting:

“Perhaps this cross is one of God’s gifts to me.

Not because suffering is good in itself,

but because He desires to use it for my good.

May I learn to embrace it,

allow it to draw me closer to Him,

and trust Him to accomplish His loving purpose through it.”

How often

what I see as a stumbling block

becomes,

in God’s hands,

a stepping stone

for spiritual growth.

Writing helps me process what the Lord is doing in my life, and I hope these reflections also help others carry their own crosses with greater hope.

I live with a debilitating, long-term case of Lyme disease (and other serious diseases) that affect many systems of my body. Much of it remains invisible to others, which can make it difficult to explain and feel loved and understood. I would be grateful for your prayers as I pray for you.

May the Lord help each of us to trust that no cross united to His is ever wasted.

A Moment to Reflect:

What cross in your life currently feels more like an obstacle than a path?

Have you ever looked back and discovered that a difficult season actually drew you closer to Jesus?

What might change if, rather than carrying your cross alone, you allowed Christ to carry it with you?

Is there something you have been asking God to remove that you could instead place in His hands today?

Take a moment before the Crucifix and pray:

Jesus, I would not have chosen this cross, but I choose You within it. Carry it with me, draw me closer to Your Heart, and let nothing I suffer in union with You be wasted.

Used With Permission: www.AdoreHim.com
(C) 2018-26 Lindsey Grace Mariella