Faith and Family Today

Over the years, the stance on cohabitation adopted by the Roman Catholic Church shows the major difficulties it now faces in coming to terms with the increasing number of issues that are challenging its teachings regarding marriage and the family. To meet changing societal views on marriage and the family, the Church is being compelled to engage in ongoing dialogue about the most effective way to communicate its teaching on marriage and the family to the rest of the world.

This article aims to examine the development of ideas within the Church regarding family, marriage, the society as a whole, and how the Church is coping with the ever-evolving practices of individuals related to these beliefs.

The Catholic Church’s Views on Family and Marriage

The theological views held by the Church on marriage and the family are generally rooted in the its fundamental beliefs. For instance, the Roman Catholic Church’s conception of marriage is firmly grounded in theological views that regard the marriage of two individuals as something very special and highly valuable to both God and the Church. Furthermore, the Church considers marriage a most special sacrament that brings great joy and blessings to the two people involved, their children, and other members of the family.

If marriage is viewed as a faithful and lifelong commitment in light of the relationship between Christ and the Church, the Roman Catholic Church supports a model in which the two spouses are considered equal. Moreover, the position favored by the Church defines the roles of husbands and wives within a marriage, encouraging a certain type of love and a corresponding kind of fidelity. Furthermore, the Church understands marriage in the context of the family and promotes a comprehensive view of the family that considers the entire society in which it lives.

The fundamental views of the Church concerning marriage and the family in today’s world provide a foundation for considering human relationships and, above all, form the basis on which the Church can respond to the different family situations of modern times. Staying true to its core beliefs is important for the Church, as contemporary society is always changing. Therefore, the Church must consistently defend its teachings while also showing kindness and understanding towards the various experiences of people in today’s families. In this way, the Church encourages people to experience God’s love in a genuinely human manner through the institution of marriage and family.

The Catholic Church’s Views on Cohabitation

However, the Roman Catholic Church’s teachings on marriage and the family are highly different from the views of the majority of people in today’s society. For instance, many marriages these days start with cohabitation, and in other cases, they end in divorce. In recent years, a great many people have ceased to see marriage as a lifelong union and have instead regarded it as merely a matter of circumstance or chance. They treat marriage as though it were simply a contract that can be freely entered into and just as easily got out of at any time without giving a second thought to the consequences for children, for families or for society as a whole. After looking at the overall state of affairs, let us now take a look at various ideas regarding the topic of cohabitation, which is a common practice today.  

As early as 1974, Warrington proposed that cohabitation was becoming established as a mainstream social practice, with young couples putting off marriage due to rising costs and changes in social norms. During that time, the Catholic Church did not hold this way of organizing relationships in high regard, viewing cohabitation as possibly weakening the sacred character of marriage and as something that might lead to a culture in which temporary relationships are the norm rather than a commitment for a lifetime. Overall, Warrington demonstrated the conflict between the Catholic Church’s attitude towards marriage and that of modern society, in which many people place their own needs and desires first and aim to satisfy them within a relationship.

In his qualitative study of the Church’s attitude towards cohabiting couples, Quirk (2007) identified the Church’s pastoral concerns and its responses. In particular, Quirk examined cohabiting relationships within the context of marriage in the Catholic Church and considered the pastoral consequences for people in such relationships, using examples of programs that involve cohabiting couples to guide them towards sacramental marriage. The study thus sheds light on the nature of the Catholic Church’s established teaching on marriage and, in doing so, identifies several pastoral difficulties that emerged from the way in which such changing relationships are now seen by the Church compared with the state of marriage in the past. Quirk argued that the Church’s understanding of marriage is in conflict with society as a whole, asserting that the present approach to such relationships by the clergy and others in the Church alienates young couples from the Church’s practice regarding sacramental marriage, when in fact, it could instead lead them to greater involvement in the Church’s life and activities.

The Church’s previous writings on cohabitation consist of a continuous discussion that examines suitable pastoral care for all kinds of relationships, covering both marriages and cohabiting relationships. Because its teachings on cohabitation will certainly reflect the fundamental aim of the Church in finding a creative balance between the need to follow doctrine and the ever-changing cultural and relational forms that are increasingly becoming part of mainstream society, the works of Quirk (2007) and Warrington (1974) are essential for a more thorough understanding of this kind of teaching in the Roman Catholic Church.

The way cultural and social changes affect family formation can be observed in how cohabitation has affected the Catholic Church’s views on marriage. Specifically, the fact that more and more people are living together shows a gap between the Church’s teachings on marriage and cohabitation in today’s society. The growing number of people living together without the bond of marriage should be understood in the context of the tension between individual decisions about cohabitation and the teachings of the Catholic Church. In particular, the Church regards premarital cohabitation as a serious sin which has to be confessed and forgiven before one can receive the sacraments. Therefore, cohabitation has serious canonical consequences and presents numerous difficulties for Catholic couples at present. However, solving these problems within the broader framework of Church structure poses major difficulties.

The same trends and cultural changes mentioned above are also apparent in Spain. As has already been seen in other contexts, the effect of this trend is being felt strongly within the Catholic Church in Spain, where its teachings now face strong and conflicting demands. However, as in other countries, this development poses major challenges for the Catholic Church in Spain. As pointed out by Domínguez-Folgueras and Castro-Martín (2013) in their study of family life and changing patterns of cohabitation in that country, there has been a marked rise in the number of couples living together, whether in their first or later relationships. It seems that Spain is going through the same cultural change that began in many parts of the world decades ago and has led more and more people to opt for cohabitation as a way to test a relationship before deciding to get married.

Meanwhile, in Quebec, Canada, Laplante (2006) stressed that the Quiet Revolution, which began in the 1960s, led to an unprecedented wave of sociocultural change that not only challenged the authority of the Church but also fundamental ideas about family life. Consequently, there emerged an increase in couples living together before marriage, as people sought to experience their relationships outside traditional arrangements. By the early 2000s, it was clear that cohabitation had become the norm rather than the exception, and this cultural shift underscores a conflict between individual autonomy and the teachings of the Catholic Church. The conflict caused by these developments has become increasingly important within the Catholic Church.

However, this does not imply that relationships based on cohabitation are any less deserving of respect. As Lawler and Salzman (2019) note. “Cohabitation is becoming more common, partly because of changing attitudes towards marriage. Young people, in particular, see cohabitation as a means of finding out whether a relationship is going to work before deciding to get married” (p. 10). Although the Catholic Church teaches that premarital cohabitation is wrong and goes against God’s intention for marriage (Thornton et al. 1992, p. 648), the Church cannot ignore the fact that cohabitation is occurring today. It therefore has to find ways to recognize the commitment that cohabiting couples make to one another while encouraging them to consider marriage (Fauve-Chamoux 2009, pp. 63–65).

As Salvini (2015) pointed out, the Church must achieve a new kind of integration by moving beyond a fixed conception of the family and by accepting diverse family models. In order to keep up with the times, the Church must come to terms with a changed world and find new ways of expressing its faith within it. Therefore, it is the Church’s challenge to recognize the dignity of every family structure, as well as that of each individual, and to direct its pastoral care towards the inclusion of all families within the community of the faithful, if it is to remain up to date.

Indeed, by understanding the reasons why people cohabit, such as economic considerations or changing ideas about commitment, the Church can adopt a more realistic and merciful approach to providing pastoral care to cohabiting couples, since the real commitment of such couples can be recognized. Thus, a model of marriage can be established that corresponds to individual circumstances while aligning with the theological importance of the sacrament of marriage.

The Catholic Church’s Views on Contemporary Family Arrangements

Aside from the rise in cohabitation, the recent years have also witnessed the emergence of different kinds of families, which have also brought challenges for the Catholic Church striving to maintain its core beliefs. While the previous section has pointed out the increasing number of cohabiting couples; this section examines how the Catholic Church views single-parent families and extended families.

More and more children are now being reared in single-parent households, and extended families are common in many countries. As Laplante pointed out, however, the Catholic Church’s view of the family has long been based on a specific model of the nuclear family. Although this model has origins in various theological traditions, in recent years there has been increasing awareness within the Church of the need for a deeper, more inclusive understanding of family.

Various scholars, such as Galea (2011) and D’Antonio (1985), have examined this development within the Catholic Church and its connection with its pastoral care of families. In particular, they have emphasized the Church’s growing acknowledgment of the legitimacy of various family forms and the importance of offering suitable pastoral care to families in all situations. Similar to D’Antonio, Galea (2011) has traced the development of a more inclusive understanding of family and has considered its effects on the Catholic Church’s teaching about marriage. Nevertheless, as D’Antonio observed, the full consequences of the Church’s changing teachings on marriage and family have still not been implemented in practice.

Research, therefore, indicates that D’Antonio (1985) is correct to argue that an institutional shift in the Catholic Church’s approach to a host of family types has taken place. Certainly, such transition is by no means complete, and, as Galea’s work so clearly illustrates, enormous continuing difficulties persist concerning the minority of families today comprised of members of the opposite sex in a biological relationship with each other. This reality today pales into relative insignificance as the increasing numbers of families, in every corner of the globe, comprising a minority of members in biological relationships with each other, are now recognized as being every bit as loving and to be valued as highly as those of the majority.

Similarly, Galea’s (2011) study points out that there has been a change in the Catholic Church’s understanding of and response to different family frameworks today compared to the past. In particular, the Church’s attitude towards marriage is in accordance with its official view of the institution. Galea highlighted the two core aspects of marriage: it is a union between two people and also a family. While the Church’s view of marriage has placed greater emphasis on the first of these two dimensions, Galea observes that over the last few decades, there have been major changes in family structures worldwide. In fact, nowadays, the largest number of children in the world are being raised by single parents. This is mainly due to the breakdown of marriage, whether through divorce or through the death of a parent; it may also apply to those who live in households with no parents because they have chosen to do so.

Despite its divergence from the Church’s teachings, there is now a growing awareness in the Church worldwide of the difficulties faced by single-parent families. This is shown in the Church’s efforts to support single parents and challenge the stereotypes associated with them. The Church’s growing recognition of single-parent households and the difficulties these families face in raising children in keeping with Christian values and within the wider Christian community is evident, thereby indicating that the Catholic Church is now taking a more inclusive approach by offering support to families, and this trend could be applied to all families.

Finally, another sign of the change in the Roman Catholic Church’s view and understanding of the family—one that has become increasingly inclusive and goes beyond the traditional family—is seen in its attitude towards extended families. Such systems and structures have been the usual arrangement in many cultures. Galea (2011) argues that that, in fact, extended families are often better at looking after children than nuclear families are in many societies around the world. Furthermore, many extended families nowadays are “burdened” with heavy responsibilities involving the care of disabled relatives and other people who require assistance. Therefore, Galea states that the Catholic Church nowadays acknowledges the importance of these systems of support and care for family members.

Meanwhile, in his examination of pastoral responses to various family situations, D’Antonio (1985) observed that in some parts of the world today, the care of children by extended families is seen as just as effective, if not more so, than that provided by nuclear families. The author ends by saying that the Catholic Church now realizes that extended-family care is of the same value as that offered by nuclear families and that both forms of care are desirable.

Thus, in many ways, the works of D’Antonio and Galea have contributed to a deeper, more refined understanding of the concept of family within the Catholic Church in the modern world. In particular, their research indicates that the Church is gradually coming to terms with single-parent and extended families and is now beginning to support them. However, a great deal more effort is still required in this field, especially in terms of gaining a thorough understanding of the Church’s teachings on the family across different cultural and social settings.

Conclusion

Indeed, the Church holds that the nature of the family is essentially linked to its teachings on marriage, and that marriage is a lifelong commitment between a man and a woman. Nevertheless, as regards the support the Church gives to families in the modern world, there is still a considerable gap that must be filled. As we have already seen, there are several family models, both within and outside the Church, and the Church should make every effort to develop a comprehensive understanding of these models and determine the best way to support families in various contexts.

In order to achieve balance between teaching the Church’s doctrine on the family and helping Christians deal more effectively with changing family arrangements, the Catholic Church should look into ways of revising its present teaching by giving greater attention to different forms of catechesis or instruction, as well as by having an open discussion about the various family models and structures within the Church as a whole.

If the Catholic Church is to remain the spiritual guide for families in our complex world, it must definitely acknowledge the changes the modern times have introduced into family life and adjust its teachings to better reflect those realities without departing from the Church’s sacred doctrines. A good beginning would be to engage in dialogue with modern families, gain a more profound understanding of their needs, and be sensitive to the situations individual families face. Only then will the Church be able to continue to guide families on their spiritual journey throughout life faithfully.

Furthermore, the Church must be able to have dialogues with those individuals who have chosen such partnerships and family arrangements to help them understand the Church’s teachings on marriage and family in such a way that they can then engage with that teaching in a constructive dialogue. To achieve this, however, the Church will have to show a higher level of understanding, compassion, and tolerance than it has previously demonstrated in the past.

References

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Domínguez-Folgueras, M., & Castro-Martín, T. (2013). Cohabitation in Spain: No longer a marginal path to family formation. Journal of Marriage and Family, 75(2), 422-437. https://doi.org/10.1111/jomf.12013

Fauve-Chamoux, A. (2009). Family formation, marital cohabitation and house system in a changing socio-economic context. Transylvanian Review, 18, 133. https://openurl.ebsco.com/contentitem/gcd:46799427?sid=ebsco:plink:crawler-gcd&id=ebsco:gcd:46799427&crl=c&jrnl=12211249

Galea, P. (2011). Cohabitation, single parenting, extended-family parenting, and the role of kinship and religion. International Journal of the Jurisprudence of the Family (Volume 2), 163. https://ssrn.com/abstract=3204789

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Lawler, M. G., & Salzman, T. A. (2019). Marriage and cohabitation: Some theological correlations. Marriage, Families & Spirituality, 25(1), 35–48. https://doi.org/10.2143/INT.25.1.3286430

Quirk, K. (2007). Cohabitation: Canonical & pastoral consequences. Canon Law Society of America, Proceedings, 69, 165. https://access.heinonline.com/hol-cgi-bin/get_pdf.cgi?handle=hein.journals/cnlwsyoam69§ion=13

Salvini, S. (2015). Living in couple. Marriage and cohabitation in a changing Italy. RIEDS - Rivista Italiana di Economia, Demografia e Statistica [The Italian Journal of Economic, Demographic and Statistical Studies, SIEDS Societa' Italiana di Economia Demografia e Statistica], 69(2), 37–56. https://www.iris.unina.it/retrieve/712d7ebe-6132-48a8-b0f3-341484cdb9ed/Rieds_2015_2_LXIX.pdf#page=37

Thornton, A., Axinn, W. G., & Hill, D. H. (1992). Reciprocal effects of religiosity, cohabitation, and marriage. American Journal of Sociology, 98(3), 628–651. https://doi.org/10.1086/230051

Vignoli, D., & Salvini, S. (2014). Religion and union formation in Italy: Catholic precepts, social pressure, and tradition. Demographic Research, 31, 1079–1106. https://doi.org/10.4054/DemRes.2014.31.35

Warrington, K. (1974). Cohabitation and the Church. Gen, 29. https://www.churchsociety.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/Cman_111_2_Warrington.pdf