A friend asked this question on Facebook and it generated a great controversy. There were all kinds of answers, from “everything” to “nothing”. And it showed me a sad reality: most people face this question about the being of the man and the being of the woman as a competition, to show which sex is better than the other.
This fight between men and women, to show who is the “best”, began in the last decades, with the advance of feminism. This tried to value the woman as equal to a man, in everything the man did, and the way the man did it. This attitude, in some aspects, may even have “forced” men to accept that women could do the same things, but it has caused great confusion in the relationship between sexes.
Before this revolution, each one had his and her own “kingdom”: the woman was the queen of the home, of the care for the house and the children, and responsible for creating the family environment. The man, in the other side, was the king of the exterior world, of the work outside the home, of the material achievements, and responsible to provide the material sustenance of the family.
The big problem was that men, because they had the economic power in their hands, many times abused of it and felt like “owners” of their wives, and didn´t properly value the role the women had in the family´s dynamics. Some women, in the attempt of proving their value, start to show they could also be like men.
This was a big mistake: instead of proving that the woman should be valued by what she is, that is, a feminine being, with feminine characteristics and a feminine way of doing things, they began to devalue everything that belongs to the feminine, creating a crazy competition to see who the best “man” was.
And now we are in this sad situation that the woman does not know what "to be a woman" means and the man does not know what "to be a man" means. The family is falling apart, there is a huge the feeling of insecurity, the levels of depression are sky high and we live in a sick society.
To change that, women need to reconquer the place they abandoned and the feminine values that they themselves despise. The woman needs to be proud of being a woman, to know she is the most qualified person to take care and educate her own children, and that her value is not in conquering the world, but in building a healthy and cozy home. And that having a man that protects and sustains her is a great proof of love, not an oppression.
And the man needs to assume his role of provider and caregiver, of support. He doesn´t have to be afraid to act like a man, knowing that the woman is his contributor, but not of the material aspect, but is responsible for the care of the great treasure that they have, their children.
The woman doesn´t do anything better than the man. The man doesn´t do anything better than the woman. Each one does things in a different way, not better, not worse. Each one has their own characteristics, their own way of being, and we were made to complement each other and not to compete!