Acceptance and Trust

Some nimble-witted sage once said, “It’s better to lose an argument than to lose a friend by winning an argument.” Those who enter into arguments with God most frequently are those who are prone to resisting his providence when he allows adversities in their life. Biblically, Job was the pioneer of this sport, distraught as he was in his suffering.

Of course, arguing with God (usually a monologue, not a dialogue) doesn’t really dissolve his friendship with us, for he will always regard us as “friends,” as Jesus called his disciples (Jn 15:15). Yet humans who challenge God’s plans and decisions lose something of their friendly regard for him. The arguing is usually a simple attitude of resistance to wholehearted submission to whatever he wants of us; it is a kind of nonacceptance of all the disturbing things that he permits to happen in our lives. Such nonacceptance of God’s will in all circumstances is the nemesis of the virtue of trust. Nothing more effectively corrodes that virtue.

This subtly rebellious attitude has multiple consequences in our lives. First, it is a complete waste of energy, since no one ever won an argument with the Almighty (he’s the Captain of the celestial debating society!). Second, this mutinous mentality prevents us from enjoying what we do have, as we frenetically hanker after what we don’t have--a fact reminiscent of the maxim of Confucius: “Happiness does not consist in having what we want, but in wanting what we have.” Third, it blunts our eagerness for the promised blessings that come to “those who do not see but believe” (Jn 20:29). Fourth, it ignores the loving concern of our heavenly Father, who “knows that you need all these things” (Mt 6:32) and exercises a hands-on control over everything--even feeding “the birds of the air” (v. 26). Fifth, it fosters the mentality of godless persons “who strive after all these things: (v. 32).

Take careful note of one critical proviso: Total acceptance is not total passivity in relating to God’s will. That would be the heresy of Quietism, which would exclude all active obedience to God’s signified will (commands and counsels), and all active striving for holiness. Total acceptance is to be understood as only one aspect of the Serenity Prayer: “Lord, give me the serenity to accept what I cannot change, and the courage to change what I can (for betterment), and the wisdom to know the difference.” There is no clearer description of what is entailed in a genuine trust in God.

This excerpt is from the book Pathways of Trust, by John H. Hampsch,C.M.F., originally published by Servant Publications. It and other of Fr. Hampsch's books and audio/visual materials can be purchased from Claretian Teaching Ministry, 20610 Manhattan Pl, #120, Torrance, CA 90501-1863. Phone 1-310-782-6408.