Spare Ribs
Do you exchange holiday greeting cards with people you haven't seen for years? If so, this reinforces the theory that social attachment - the need to belong, found in every culture - is more than a desire; it's a drive as strong as self-preservation. Greeting card exchange is just one way we maintain social linkage.
Psychologists say that this need to belong has two aspects: 1) frequent, positive interactions with the same persons, and 2) a framework of long-term, stable caring and concern. "A faithful friend is a life-saving remedy," says the proverbialist (Sir 6:16, NAB).
In established relationships, rejection is more hurtful than in a casual relationship. Being emotionally unsupported for an extended time by a parent, friend, or spouse can arouse apathy, anxiety, loneliness, depression, and often suicide or crime. Thus, a bonding can become a bondage. Once established, relationships are not easy to break away from, even when recognized as socially or spiritually harmful, as in gangs, cults, abusive marriages, gay partnerships, adultery, incest, and so on. To belong can be wrong.
To avoid disasters, like a life-shattering divorce, test your relationships early in the game. "Let your acquintances be many, but one in a thousand your confident. When you gain a friend, first test him, and be not too ready to trust him" (Sir 6:6-7, NAB). Seek out truly faithful friends - and seek to be one!
This excerpt is from the book One-Minute Meditations for Busy People, by John H. Hampsch, C.M.F., originally published by Servant Publications. It and other of Fr. Hampsch's books and audio/video recordings can be purchased from Claretian Teaching Ministry, 20610 Manhattan Pl, #120, Torrance, CA 90501-1863. Phone 1-310-782-6408 or www.Catholicbooks.net
The Rev. John H. Hampsch, C.M.F., ordained as a Catholic priest in 1952, is a member of the Claretian Missionaries, and is founder and director of the Claretian Teaching Ministry. Listed in Who’s Who in Religion in America, he has served as parish priest, seminary professor and rector, college professor, lecturer, magazine writer, newspaper columnist, editor, retreat master, hospital chaplain, prison chaplain, campus chaplain, Cursillo director and director of suicide prevention programs in Texas and California.
He earned degrees in philosophy from Loyola-Marymount University in Los Angeles and from Notre Dame University, with postgraduate work at the University of Southern California and the Dominican House of Studies in River Forest, Illinois, in ascetical and mystical theology.
Find his many books and audio/visual recordings at www.Catholicbooks.net
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