World Doula Week! How doulas help families and what is a doula anyway?
Our parish at Mater Dei Latin Mass (Extraordinary Form) is creating a new ministry titled Michael's Miscarriage Ministry. I am hoping to at least participate as much as possible.
So, I thought it would be appropriate for November to talk about miscarriage and a ministry that I am hoping to start more nationally title "Women Officiating Mourning and Bereavement" or W.O.M.B. Right now it is connected with the Catholic Bereavement "Certified Sorrowful Doula" program I teach through www.catholicdoula.com or http://www.catholicdoula.com/our-lady-of-sorrows-bereavement.html
One of the stats that I heard about is that every 1 to 4 or 6 pregnancies ends up in a miscarriage. It is sad fact that many mothers grieve a loss silently with no support. Some mothers may not even have the dignity of a burial for their child (given the way our society views abortion "rights") and the hospital will dipose of the remains in an unfit way. Now, not all miscarriages you can even find remains of a baby, it depends on how far along you are....(Around 12 weeks to 22 or 23 weeks may have a baby body).
One of my friends had a loss and they were able to have a proper burial and even Catholic funeral for their lost son as part of a ministry in another state.
I have suffered a miscarriage (maybe two). The recent miscarriage was very early; so I didn't have a baby to bury only "empty arms" as I mourn a missing child in my heart. We have 4 children and this would have been our fifth child. I miss the idea of having another little one running around (he or she would have been one by now).
Naming the child...at our first Michael's Ministry Mass of Rememberance; we had a good talk by one of our priests Father O'Brien. He assured us of our loved ones are in a better place (Limbo) and that they do not suffer and are loved by God in this special place. (Maybe you don't call it Limbo--but God's arms; it doesn't matter, they are with God; The Catholic Church clearly teaches they are not in Heaven, as they are not baptized). Father O'Brien believes that these children are not alone, that angels can visit them and that there are other children there as well. Giving our lost children names is one way to find peace. One family names their lost children Francis; others give more specific names. I named our child Mary Hope Celestina.
Supporting mothers of loss: This is one of my goals in a national organization of W.O.M.B. is to help mothers through loss and find the resources they need to obtain a proper burial when needed of their lost child. Also, stillbirth is also a later loss and should also be respected. W.O.M.B. needs leaders to train and help mothers with loss. If you are interested, we will just ask for a freewill donation for the W.O.M.B. training. Email us at catholicdoulaprogram@gmail.com
We also have a website at: www.pregnancylossnetwork.com where we are hosting more resources for mothers; if you know a good resource to add to our list, please contact us and we will add it to the website.
We appreciate all your help in spreading the word about helping mothers with loss. God Bless.