A Governor's Tale: Satire for the Empire State

The elegant chandelier filled the conference room with light. Twelve men entered, dressed in tuxedos and smoking cigars. One carried a baseball bat, swinging it as he entered. If someone stumbled across the group, at first glance it would appear these were important men of high status and the observer would be right.

The dozen men took their seats at the long table. A podium and microphone were available for their use, but the men talked so loudly no one bothered to use them.

Finally one man rose. The others quickly quieted.

“Gentlemen, as you know, we're gathering tonight to celebrate our win. It's said that Rome wasn't built in a day, and that is true. It took us a while but we got it done. Thanks to the Governor for signing it.” He sat back down.

The crowd applauded. A man with a wrinkled face, and graying hair, both signs of the ticking clock of his mortality, stood up while the crowd whistled and cheered.

“Governor, will you speak?” asked a man, sitting at his left.

“Yeah, sure. I'd like to say, it wasn't easy, but we got it done. We are the champions.”

The crowd continued to applaud.

The Governor added, “We won't stand for any interference in our business, if you know what I mean.”

The crowd laughed. Smoke from their cigars filled the room.

The Governor waved his hands to signal he wanted to continue. “It's economics really. We have a supply and demand issue. New York will make some money on it. Besides, we won't take 'no' for an answer! After today, our enemies will know their place. If anyone interferes, there will be consequences, if you know what I mean.”

The room broke out with hoots. A man grabbed the baseball bat he brought into the room and pretends to smash it into the man next to him. He said, “BOOM!”

The Governor continued, “We are not taking no crap from anybody. We won't tolerate any opposition. No way. And that goes for the preachers too.”

“Don't worry they'll get theirs!” someone said as he pretended to punch the air.

Another man yelled, “You better watch it, Governor, or the Cardinal will read your name at Mass.”

The Governor answered, “They don't got the guts.”

“Hey, where are the ladies dressed up as the Handmaids?” a man said. The men whistled and shouted.

“Let's write the Governor's Tale,” another man added. The crowd cheered.

The Governor moved his hands up then down twice. He stated, “Settle it down. Seriously, we're here to celebrate our victory. We are champions for women. There's no greater love than to lay down a fetus' life so they may live how they want to live.”

The End.