Valentine’s Day, like Christmas and Easter, has become more of a commercialized holiday for businesses to cash in rather than a day to make a difference. Think about this, your spouse or significant other is expecting something on Valentine’s Day from you. If you do not show up with flowers or a gift in some form then you are in some serious trouble. But, what if you made every day Valentine’s Day in your relationship – and you could do it basically for free? What kind of a difference would that make in your marriage or relationship?
Your wife is expecting flowers, a card, or some gift (or all of the above) on Valentine’s Day. But, what if she woke up one random morning to you bringing her breakfast in bed? Perhaps make a plate with some bacon and eggs, a piece of toast, a cup of her favorite coffee, and handwrite a small note saying you love her on it. An unexpected surprise that she will talk more about to her friends than about what you got her on Valentine’s Day. It’s an unexpected surprise she will remember longer than the red roses you purchased that died a couple weeks later.
“But God demonstrates his own love for us in this; while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8) Love is action. Love is more than a day on the calendar, a signature on a marriage license, or a feeling you get when you get a new girlfriend or boyfriend. Love is action and actions show love. Jesus demonstrated his love. So, here are 5 ways you can demonstrate your love to your spouse every day of the year (without breaking the bank):
1.) Random notes of love: Get a piece of paper and cut it into strips. Write on each strip notes to encourage your spouse throughout the day and remind her/him of your love. Things like “I love you and would marry you again”, “I love your smile and am so proud to be your husband/wife”, “You’re such a great mother to our kids. Thank you so much for loving them as much as I love you.” Choose your own sayings. After you write them out, randomly put them in your wife’s purse or your husband’s wallet for them to find later during the day.
2.) Date night jar: Take a Mason jar or any empty container and place small cards or strips of paper in it for date night ideas. For example, one could say “Certificate for one cell phone free date night”, “This entitles you to one back massage”, “This guarantees you one walk in the park together,” or “Certificate for one night of watching binge TV and drinking wine”, and these are easy to do. Make about 20-30 of them (or more if you would like) and then let your spouse choose when she/he wants to do them throughout the year and make a promise that when they “cash in” their certificates that you honor them.
3.) Do the dishes: It does not have to be just dishes, but choose a household chore your spouse has on their “to-do” list that you know they hate to do and get it done for them.
4.) Begin a morning Bible routine: Wake up an extra 30 minutes earlier than normal and make your spouse coffee. Bring the coffee to her/him in bed and then bring your Bible or Daily Missal. Begin reading and praying together for 15-20 minutes each morning. “For I am convinced that neither death nor life neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:38-39) Invite the author of perfect love into your relationship each morning.
5.) Choose random nights during the year and make a bubble bath for your wife: Run the hot bath for her and then line the bathroom and bathtub with candles, a glass of wine, and photos of your favorite moments together in your relationship. Let her enjoy a hot, relaxing bath several times throughout the year (on random days, not birthdays or holidays) while sipping on her favorite wine and taking a joyful trip down memory lane. Each time you do this during the year, change the photos up so they represent different times in your relationship each time.
These are simple, easy ideas that can be used or create your own. The more important aspect is to remember that God loves us 365 days a year and 24 hours a day. “His mercies are new every morning” (Lamentations 3:22-23) Imagine if God only showed us how much he loved us once or twice a year. The author of love shows us his love in many different ways throughout the year. We should do the same for each other. It truly will make a difference in your home and your relationship.